(5th Entry) Things Happen for a Reason… Or Do They?

I used to want to argue with people when they said, “things happen for a reason.” I’ve mellowed in my old age. Instead of arguing, I simply point out that… Yes things might happen for a reason, but… How we respond to what happens to us gives it meaning. A lot of bad things happen in this world… very bad things. To me, to say that things happen for a reason is a great excuse not to be responsible for how I respond. For instance, being born the way that I was born has no meaning unless I do something with my life. If I sit back and believe that this happened for a reason, then I’m not responsible. It gives me permission to be angry, bitter and the ability to blame.

For me, meaning or reason comes out of what we do with our lives, situations that happen to us. If you read the poem… “TO DREAM TO TOUCH” (2nd Entry) you can see the despair, the inability or knowledge of how to go forward with life. Fortunately you can also see the hope and the desire. I wrote that upon graduating from college. (Again many more blog entries to explain my life)

So often in my life I’ve heard… “It’s amazing how you’ve over-come your disability.” The problem is that I was trying to over-come. Back in the mid to late 80’s I was reading a book, an interview with James Hillman where he was talking about depression. He said something that changed my perspective immediately… (not that others hadn’t tried to do so, but this time it clicked) He said the object is not to over-come your depression, but to learn to live with it and in it.

What an amazing concept! The object is not to over-come my disability, but to learn to live with it. In other words… GIVE IT MEANING, QUITE FIGHTING, QUIT BLAMING and TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.

Yet this is much easier said than done for most of us. It takes most of us time. It's taken me 47 years.

How did I get here? How can you?

This to me is what my BLOG is all about...