This is a short vignette on what it means to have a disability… Growing up and even today there’s a common scenario that takes place which anyone with any type of disability can relate too. I go to the store. I buy some items and proceed to the check-out stand. I have someone with me, maybe we’re talking… it doesn’t matter, but it’s obvious that we’re together. I place the items on the check-out table and hand the person the money. Nine times out of ten… the person not only hands the change back to the person with me, but addresses that person with any questions that they might have.
This might sound odd to those that have never experienced it. Others try to make you feel better by coming up with reasons that this might happen or it’s just…
One of the things that I try to do when I work with other disabled individuals is to help them understand that there is an effect that we have on others. We can debate if this is good or bad or just is what it is… But, the thing that I try to emphasize to individuals is that the only thing that matters is how we, ourselves, interpret this situation. How does it make us feel? How do we react? What do we allow these situations to keep us from doing? How does it make us feel about ourselves is the bottom line. How we interpret our interactions with others is what we have an ability to control within ourselves.
These events and how we interpret them are the one’s that determine if we’re just going to just go on with life blindly, become motivated or slip into learned helplessness.
Back to the vignette… I don’t like that I get reacted to in this way! Can I change it? No! But… I can act or react to it. That’s my choice. First, I only have the choice when I am aware of it happening. Second, how I act is based upon quite a few things. How do I feel about myself? What kind of mood am I in? Am I angry about this situation and who I am? The list goes on… In other words, I can effect the situation positively or negatively based upon how and where I am coming from.
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